Monthly Archives: April 2013

Myths about infant(s)

Myth: Put your baby down for a nap as soon as he shows signs of being tired; a yawn or an eye rub for example.

Truth: Your baby might be ready to sleep right away…or you might have to rock him for 45 minutes while he gnaws on his soother like it’s a cigar and intermittently swipes at your face.

Myth: sleep begets sleep, in other words, if your baby has a nice long 2 hour nap, he will have a nice deep sleep that night.

Truth: Remember that 2 hour nap fondly as you rock your baby at warp speed in the glider at 3am…

Myth: a bit of rice cereal in the evening will fill him up and help him have a nice long sleep without needing to nurse.

Truth: no it won’t. That is all.

Myth: developing a good bedtime routine will signal to your child that it’s bedtime. Try warm bath, songs, reading a book.

Truth: your baby is humouring you. He knows what’s coming and is preparing for a long night of battling sleep. Bath makes no difference other than they smell a bit nicer when they are clinging to your shoulder at midnight wailing like a banchee. You can try reading to them, but in my experience they just get frustrated when you don’t let them eat the book. Why title a book Each Peach Pear Plum if it’s not edible?!

Myth: having a solid routine will offer stability, so that they know what to expect and will be comfortable with bedtime.

Truth: except when they are teething. Or reaching a developmental mile stone. Or going through a growth spurt. Or separation anxiety. Or when a western wind is blowing.

Myth: make sure you take time for yourself to recharge.

Truth: because when you get back from the spa you will have a baby who might never forgive you for leaving, and will express his displeasure with at least one sleepless night.

Myth: you will forget all the bad stuff about infants, only remember the snuggles and tiny fingers and toes, and inevitably pop out another.

Truth: if I go through this again it’s not because I’ve forgotten the lack of sleep and never-ending days, it’s because I’m a glutton for punishment and I might have joined a masochist cult or something.

Love you babies!

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Sickies

So the littles are sick. Like, horrible rattling cough, snotty faces, whining, tired, miserable sick.

Two sick babies mean mommy and daddy don’t sleep.

And not “don’t sleep” as in “oh, my baby was up all night, he only slept for like 5 hours” sort of don’t sleep. No, that IS sleep my friends. No sleep is rocking a wheezing baby in a rocking chair for 4 hours because he won’t let you put him down, and hearing another baby stirring in the next room, after it took her an hour and a half to fall asleep two hours earlier…

That is no sleep.

No sleep is putting the sick baby in his crib and telling your husband, I can’t, because it is dawning on you that not only have you been rocking sick, snotty babies all day, and all night, but in 3 hours you’re going to have to do it for another whole day.

No sleep is crying silently because if you wake a baby you might throw up.

Okay, that’s a bit melodramatic.

But not untrue.

They will get better. They will sleep. The snot will dry up. But right now? Mommy and daddy are wondering how the human race has survived this long.

And I’m pretty sure daddy is making an appointment for snip snip.

That is all.

Sarah

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